Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
