she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
