Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
You're a waste of cheezeits
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
