i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
