why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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