what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
