You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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