I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Randomize
