I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
My vagina just recognized that song.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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