I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
