Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
