I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
