At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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