Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
