I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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