hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
