You're a womanizer and a bitch.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize