i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
