so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
