So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
