I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
