no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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