I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
