Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
