Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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