Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
