I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
