Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Randomize
