Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
