I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
