I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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