Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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