I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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