I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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