Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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