so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
People with herpes should wear stickers.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
