check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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