I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
