When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
