just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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