You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
