Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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