I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
