Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
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