I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
