Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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