school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
