he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
