you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
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