Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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